Archive for the ‘Passion’ category

Happy YOUR Year!

January 1st, 2013

2013 Going Forward ListLike every year in your life, 2013 is YOUR YEAR.  It’s sure to bring you multiple opportunities to live with a clear mind, a grateful heart, and look forward to the next steps on your journey with joy-filled anticipation.

The start of the new year is the perfect time for Intentional Reflection.  Purposefully look back on the year that has passed to set the stage for moving forward to the year ahead. Here are a few thoughts to guide your process.

Assess YOUR YEAR – 2012 – by making two lists:  a Grateful For and a Going Forward list

On your Grateful For list, note all the good you experienced, all the goals you accomplished; list everything for which you’re grateful.  Because we sometimes lose sight of how truly fortunate we are and how much good is ours, you very well may be surprised at the content and length of your list.  Your Grateful For list is a reminder of how wonder-full your life is everyday.

On your Going Forward list, include whatever you’re longing to experience; want to try your hand at, improve, strengthen or add to your repertoire and skill set.  Be honest with yourself.  Note only that which speaks to your heart’s desire and is calling for fulfillment.  Jot down one or two things you’re truly committed to adding to your Grateful For list, on or before December 31, 2013.  Let this year – your year – be the year you take steps to satisfy your deepest longings.  These longings are your Spirit and Purpose calling for attention and fulfillment.

As you move into your 2013, empower yourself with the knowledge that you are the creative and defining force in your life.  Through the beliefs you hold, the thoughts you think, the emotions and feelings you experience, and your daily behavior choices, you shape your life.  That being so, you have the uncontested ability and power to make your life more like you want it to be.

Intentional Reflection and Conscious Choice are tools that can help you identify self-limiting beliefs, release outdated patterns of behavior and make more effective choices – choices that result in greater self-awareness, personal power and success.  Intentional Reflection and Conscious Choice lead to Transformational Change that will help you live better, and more effectively interact with the people who look to you for trustworthy friendship and leadership

May your Grateful For list delight you.  May your Going Forward list honor the call of your Spirit and align with your Purpose.  May Intentional Reflection and Conscious Choice help you make your year one that touches your Spirit, speaks to your sense of Purpose and enhances your effectiveness in every area of your life.

You can learn more about the powerful possibilities of Intentional Reflection, Conscious Choice and Transformational Change in LIES That Limit:  Uncover the Truth of Who You Really Are.

Happy YOUR Year!

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How To Give Yourself the Gift of Change This Year

December 18th, 2012


I was coaching a man recently, and his reaction to the call for change was classic.

To Jack, changing meant he wouldn’t be the person he used to be.  About that, we agreed.  He wouldn’t be his old self any longer.

As he contemplated change, his concerns began to surface. “I don’t want to lose myself.  I mean, I’m me.  I’ve been this way all of my life.  Anything else would feel phony and awkward.”

Jack also admitted that he was concerned about how others would see him and respond to the changes.   He worried that he wouldn’t be seen as credible.  “Who’s going to believe it?”

I offered the thought that changing wouldn’t make him less of who he is.  He’d become more.  He’d have access to more of his whole self which includes parts and behavior patterns he knows well, parts and potential that are less familiar, and skill and abilities that are underdeveloped.

“Jack, any time you want to stop using the new skill, you can.  At will, you can go back to your old way because whatever you change – a behavior, a mindset, a belief – it’s still yours.  You can call it up and begin using it again, any time you choose.  In a very real sense, you haven’t lost anything, you’ve added something.”

Jack breathed a sigh of relief.  “That makes perfect sense.  It seems so simple when you say it that way.  I’m in.  I’ll give it a try.”

This holiday season, give yourself the gift of change.   Become more of who you really are.

Make a decision to let go of LIES That Limit your freedom of choice, your effectiveness at work, your success in relationships, your willingness to take action and make changes for your own good.

Try something you’ve been wanting to do.  Learn a skill that intrigues you.  Give up a habit that no longer serves you.  Adopt a new behavior or perspective that will help you live better now.

When you add new experiences, beliefs and behaviors to your repertoire, you expand your capacity, broaden your range of capability, and deepen your awareness of your limitless potential.  Emboldened with a new skill set and perspective, you’re equipped to do more, to embody more of who you really are.  You take another step in the direction of wholeness.

So, what about you?  What changes are calling to you – changes that might help you gain access to more of your whole self?

My personal answer is simple.  I have two commitments:

  1. I’m going to give myself a morning and an afternoon practice of taking ten deep, conscious breaths with the goals of relaxing, clearing my mind and energizing my body.
  2. At least four days a week this winter (I walk during the summer, happily, but avoid the winter winds), I’m going to walk three miles a day.  Walking helps me to inhabit my body, work out the kinks, strengthen my legs, lungs and heart, build physical energy and facilitate mental clarity.  I deserve these good gifts all year-round.

Embrace your change – be it large or small – and make 2013 the year you become more of who you really are.

Happy Holidays!

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NEW Website for Spirit of Purpose Community

July 10th, 2012

Today, I’m happy to announce, we’ve launched the new Spirit of Purpose™ website.

This new dynamic website is where our community can come together and learn more about how they can Live Better Now!   It is a place where you’ll find encouragement to make conscious choices that will lead to authentic, lasting growth.

The Spirit of Purpose™ mission is to build a vibrant, active, passionate community of people who are committed to Self-awareness, Self-acceptance and Self-mastery as a path to a better life.  Guided by a process of intentional reflection and conscious choice, we support you in making changes that transform your life – changes aligned with your deeper self.  Your real Self.

You become a Spirit of Purpose™ when you take your blinders off and lift the veil of LIES™ (Labels, Illusion, Excuses and Stories) in your life.  This is the topic of my first book “LIES That Limit: Uncover the Truth Of Who You Really Are” which is the initial step on the never-ending journey to becoming your authentic Self, knowing and embodying your truth.

The new website will host the same great blogs that have been available on the LIES That Limit™ site.  We invite you to subscribe via RSS, Facebook or Twitter so you won’t miss any of the inspiration shared daily.  And we welcome guest bloggers interested in helping others through telling the stories of their life lessons learned.  We invite you to share how you let go of limiting LIES™ and became the Spirit of Purpose you were born to be.

The Spirit of Purpose™ website also offers a toolkit filled with life changing opportunities – the newest of which is “Sacred Circles.”  This one-on-one or group program opens the door to knowing and being your real Self.  Your SACRED Self!  Take advantage of this rare opportunity and join other committed seekers, all walking their path toward Self-realization.

Core Energetics therapy and personal coaching are two additional tools that will help you live and lead with a Spirit of Purpose™.  Contact us at to schedule your consultation and take the next step on your path to wholeness.

Please take a look around our new website and let us know what you like, and how we can improve it to help you reach your goals.  It’s a working, changing site for a growing and thriving community of Spirits with Purpose.  We welcome your feedback!

In honor of your limitless possibilities,


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GUEST BLOG: Remember How Good It Felt to Swing?

May 15th, 2012

By Guest Blogger Kyle Ruffin

It felt like you were flying.  There was something about the simple movement of swinging back and forth, somewhat out of control, that brought about amazing joy when you were a kid.  So much so that writing about it is bringing back a little of that sensation.

One day recently, while going about my humdrum routine of tasks and obligations, I walked by a watercolor painting of kids crowded onto one of those 4-person swings.  They had so much joy painted on their faces.  I thought, wow, I remember feeling that way.  A bunch of friends, or maybe even strange kids I didn’t really know, not caring that we were touching and sharing germs as we enjoyed in the simple act of swinging.  It was before all our phobias had kicked in.  Before Dr. Oz showed us how many germs are on the average kid’s toy.  Or before we became obsessed with engaging only in things that would grow our bank accounts.  Before we became afraid of embarrassing ourselves or looking silly.  Before we started experiencing life vicariously through our kids.  It’s just not the same thing.

All the while, we wonder “Where’d the joy go?  Why don’t I get the same excitement out of simple things in life?”   The kids are having all the fun and we’re feeling empty.   I find my excitement these days is pretty limited to sharing a bottle of wine, a meal and good conversation with my friends and family.  I do love that, but it’s time to diversify the things from which I derive pleasure.  All my physical activity is focused on getting or staying fit – not the joy of movement for it’s own sake.

There’s a lot to be gained by engaging the body in fun stuff.  It’s actually good for our precious mind.  It shakes loose all those cobwebs and gets the blood flowing to parts that haven’t seen blood in a while.   It’s hard not to be present and fully in the moment when you’re throwing your body around.  Not to mention how good those endorphins feel.

I applaud you if you’re one of those people Electric Sliding or Chicken Dancing on the wedding reception dance floor?  Or if you ski — wind in your face, moving at a speed that’s just out of control enough to feel exhilarating but not dangerous.   Okay…maybe a little dangerous.   Time for me to join you!

I’m heading down to the playground to see if that swing set my association dues paid for will hold my weight.  If not, I’ll track down a hoola-hoop to throw my body into.   Some simple fun.  I consider it my reward for all the time I’ve focused on my bank account.

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How to Connect With You Inner Wisdom

April 24th, 2012

In this month’s O Magazine, Oprah asked a number of readers, “What do you appreciate most about getting older?”  While I enjoyed each woman’s response, Azadeh Reza Mercado said, “Finding, hearing and listening to my inner voice.”

Her response reminded me of last week’s blog about hearing your true voice, not the myriad of voices in your head – your mother’s, your 1st grade teacher’s, your older sister’s, the minister or rabbi’s, your girlfriends’, or the thing you read most recently – but the truth that comes from the deepest part of who you really are.  Like Ms. Mercado, I am thankful for the ever-present voice within that communicates with me.

In a recent conversation with a client, I said, “I treasure the clarity and peace I receive from hearing from the wise one within me.”

She then asked, “How do you know it’s your inner voice and not just some other voice in your head?”  Her question made me think.

I told her that the voice of my inner self – my guide and counselor, my higher self – always leaves me feeling calm, clear and certain.

Truly, for me, it’s that simple.  When I connect with my inner guide, I shift from unrest to feeling at ease.  I morph from confusion about what I feel, think or need to do or say into clear confident being.  All the tension in my shoulders disappears.  The dull ache in my head evaporates.  The tightness and churn in my gut settles down.  I breathe a full, deep, unrestricted breath.  In this way, my body is a good barometer.  It recognizes and accepts the powerful truth and wisdom of my higher self.

Maybe you’ve experienced this after turning down an invitation to something that you just didn’t want to attend, or you found a creative solution to a nagging problem.  Or maybe the calm came after you stood your ground where you’d normally give in.  The result – you got just what you wanted, what you needed.

The wise one within you is continually trying to connect with you, to serve you.  She wants to ease your burdens, answer your questions, guide you through tough decisions and help you find the easiest path to your next destination.

Like Azadeh Reza Mercado do you value and trust what you hear from within?  If you don’t have a solid relationship with your inner self, if you aren’t sure you’d know her if she came to your front door or if you’ve never considered this question, there are easy steps you can take to test the waters.

The first critical step is acknowledging that you want to.  Then, once a day, or once a week, take the time to interact and engage.  Ask questions to which you’d like answers.  Start with a simple question like, “How should I approach my co-worker/friend/mother-in-law about an issue I’m having.”  Then, look and listen for a response.  The answer may come through a book, another person, a dream, a sudden knowing, etc.  Or say to your higher self, “I’m here to listen.  Speak to me.”

Then, sit and wait patiently.  Words, images, feelings, ideas, thoughts will come into your awareness.  The more you listen for and accept the messages that come to you, the easier it is to hear her whispers.

Listening and hearing takes practice.  In order to trust what you hear and receive, a leap of faith may be required, particularly early on.  You may find that you have to decide to suspend disbelief and, through an act of faith, accept that what you’re hearing is credible and trustworthy.

Ask, listen and trust what you receive. Consciously choose to connect with your inner voice, your internal and eternal wisdom.


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Guest Blog: Choose Wisely

April 10th, 2012

Tommy Hilcken

By Tommy Hilcken, Motivational Humorist & President of the New Jersey Chapter of The National Speakers Association

It’s been a challenging couple of weeks for me spiritually. I have attended 2 funerals in 2 weeks for people I felt were 2 young to die.

As I sat and listened to the sermons and the praises for these people…I leaned over and said to my friend…What would you like it to say on your tombstone? I meant it…what would you like people to say?

It was there, I realized the secret is to decide what you want it to say and start thinking and behaving with that outcome in mind.

One day we will be called to give an account for our life. Your family and friends will do their best to provide the kind of funeral service to best commemorate your life.

If you could choose what you would want on your tombstone, what would you have inscribed there? Would you want it to be some significant word or phrase that best describes the life you have lived? “He/She was the kindest, most helpful, selfless, loving person I ever met.”

Or would you want something rather insignificant like, “Gone but not forgotten” or “Rest in peace”?

The choice is yours. Choose to be significant.

Tommy Hilcken
Motivational Humorist
President of the New Jersey Chapter of The National Speakers Association

SPECIAL NOTE:  After Tommy gave me permission to post this contribution to the LIES That Limit blog, his father passed away on Saturday, March 31st.   Please join me in sending Tommy and his family our condolences and a wish that he only remember the love he shared with his father and all who have recently made their transition.


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Is Donald Trump Happier Than You?

April 3rd, 2012

How about insanely rich Oprah?  Or always upbeat Kelly Ripa?  Or devilishly handsome George Clooney?

I must admit, I haven’t actually asked any of them how happy they are, but I’m willing to go out on a limb and say YES.  But it’s not for the reasons you might be thinking.  It’s not because they have so much money that they don’t have to worry about where the next mortgage payment is coming from.  Or because they jet set around the world on a whim or always look like they belong on the cover of a magazine.

They’re happy because they’re doing what they LOVE!  What they were born to do.  It’s what they can’t imagine not doing, because if they stopped, they’d die.  None of the folks who keep company with Donald, Oprah, Kelly or George could ever spend the mountains of money thrown at them.  I’d guess that most people doing what they LOVE don’t even know how much money they have because it has ceased to be an issue.

George doesn’t make movies because of how much money he’ll make.  He makes them because he thinks he’ll enjoy playing that part.  Oprah could have continued on her path to syndication riches, but she decided to take a giant leap of faith by launching OWN.  And if you believe the critics, it’s not coming as easily as she thought it would.  But my money is on Oprah because she LOVES what she does so much, that she will make it work – even if that means accepting and learning from failure.

Yeah, yeah, yeah…those are TV stars, business moguls, people who’s lives you might not be able to relate to or learn from, but here are a few less extravagant examples.  Starting with me.  I was born a poor black child … oh wait a minute, that was Steve Martin in “The Jerk.”  But really, I was born a poor black child  — in the south to parents who’s beginnings were even humbler than mine.  My love of listening to and guiding others to find their purpose has become a way of life for me.  There’s a place in the world for people who need what I do and I’ve been able to turn it into a very successful career.  First in corporate HR, then in corporate coaching and now in personal growth.   It was who I was born to be.

The husband of a dear friend of mine walked away from a high paying job – even though they had a new mortgage and two small children.  He took a giant leap of faith.  Casting away the safety net he ventured out to find the job he wanted.  Crazy right?  But he followed his dream and his heart and now has accepted a position that’s tailor-made for him.  Think he’s as happy as Donald Trump today?

My book LIES That Limit is filled with stories about people who denied themselves the pursuit of their dreams and have since shed the limiting LIES to follow their hearts.  So I ask you, who’s dream are you actually living?  Even if you’re living from paycheck to paycheck, why not be poor doing something you LOVE?   Where’s the risk?

Doing something you LOVE makes the inevitable obstacles much easier to overcome.   It might take some creativity to find a way to get paid for what you LOVE, but you’re already using your creative energy to do what someone else thinks is worthwhile.   It will likely take several tries and maybe a failure or two.  The stories we hear about overnight sensations are rarely — if ever — true.  The difference is that LOVE carried them through the tough times, the hours of rehearsing, the years of schooling, the rejections and the hurtful doubting of others.

There are many things that come along and take our eyes off the prize.  And we devise solutions that seem to be expedient and but they’re only temporary.  The “I’ll take any job to pay my bills” is a trap – one that keeps you bound to a life you despise and one that likely furthers the dreams of someone else.

That voice calling you toward your true purpose is leading you to the ultimate prize – the only prize that will give you the lasting joy you seek.

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How to Journal Your Truth and Inspire Others

January 17th, 2012

Since LIES That Limit hit the market, many of you have asked, “What other products do you have available?”

Well, we heard you.  Today, I’m happy to announce that in addition to the executive coaching, keynote addresses and customized workshops that comprise the core Spirit of Purpose®  offerings, we now have two new products:

“Journal Your Truth” and Transform Your Life

Journaling will help you to get to know your deeper Self better, solve your toughest problems, strengthen your intuition and creativity, and document your story.  Journaling is a great way to clear your mind, reduce stress, sort through the issues and conflicts in your life, and develop a solid plan of action for moving forward.

The Journal Your Truth notebook will help you align your head and your heart.  When your thoughts, feelings, energy and intentions are aligned, you become a powerhouse.  Consciously aligning energy and intentions makes the “Law of Attraction” work for you.  Journaling clears away the energetic drag of doubt, fear, worry, anxiety and negativity.

If you’ve read LIES That Limit, you know that at the end of each chapter there is a section called, “Journal Your Truth.”  It contains questions designed to help you apply the content of the chapter to your life.  This journal is the perfect place to document your Self-exploration and its a safe place to bare your soul and bear witness to YOUR truth.   Sometimes, you even hide the truth from yourself.

Use this tool as little as 10 minutes a day to practice the art of intentional reflection, and you’ll find yourself making better, more empowered decisions.  Intentional reflection enables conscious choice and conscious choice will transform your life.

Inspire Your Circle of Friends and Family With Spirit of Purpose® Notecards

The next tine you reach for a notecard to send someone – celebrating an accomplishment, acknowledging a milestone, emboldening their courage, helping them get back on track, supporting their decision – send a Spirit of Purpose® notecard. Each package contains 10 beautifully designed notecards with one of 5 life-affirming messages from the book LIES That Limit.  Inside each card is beautiful white space waiting for the special, personal message you want to share.

Special Limited Time Offer:  Book Club Bundle

For a limited time, we’re offering a FREE journal or set of notecards with any purchase of 10 or more copies of LIES That Limit: Uncover The Truth Of Who You Really Are.  Put LIES That Limit on your 2012 Book Club list.  It will stimulate life-changing discussion, and give you and your entire group real, simple and  attainable tools to Live Better Now.

LIES That Limit also makes a great gift for family, friends and co-workers who are in transition, or who need to examine the things that are standing in the way of a happy, fulfilling and exhilarating life.

Welcome to a new year of positive change in your life and the lives of the people you care so much about!  

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Everything You Need for Your Fantastic Life!

January 10th, 2012

Kate Siner Francis, PhD

Ever wake up wondering, “How did I get here?”  Ever go to bed wondering, “Is this all there is?” Well, if so, now is a good time to change all that!

My colleague, Kate Siner Francis, founder of the Life Fulfillment Formula and the Larger Visions, has a convened an outstanding group of 12 experts to offer you The Your Fantastic Life Telesummit, January 17th through March 6th.  Each hour-long seminar will take you on a journey to significant insights.  I’m one of the speakers, along with a number of other colleagues.  We aim to address your most important questions about how to improve your life and become more empowered.

In this series you’ll learn powerful tools and essential skills that will help you:

    • Be happier each and every day
    • Deal effectively with relationship challenges
    • Free yourself from parts of your past that no longer serve you
    • Learn to be a master of self-care
    • See more clearly how you get stuck and how to break free

And much, much more…

The series is completely FREE! Listen in from wherever you are by phone or computer.  Each workshop will be available for 24 hours after airing.  Be sure to take advantage of the life-changing wisdom that will be shared.

You’ll find the full schedule and all details for this FREE series at

Remember, you’ll hear 12 experts, over 6 weeks, who will help you overcome the obstacles that hold you back from fulfillment and YOUR future – the future you have dreamed of.

Join us for the “Your Fantastic Life” Telesummit.  Sign up at  So that next time someone asks you how you’re doing, you say, in full integrity, “My life is fantastic!  I’m fantastic!“

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“I Know!”

December 7th, 2011

Teressa Moore GriffinThe slow moving security line was about 70-people deep. Still uplifted by days in the warm Caribbean sun and blue-green waters, no one complained. Eye contact and smiles were exchanged between strangers. Nods of recognition passed between those who might have seen one another at the hotel, on a beach or at a restaurant. Friends and family members laughed, pleasured by shared stories of a good time. Chatting with my husband, and people watching, I entertained myself as we waited.

Scanning the crowd, she caught my eye…a light, an unmistakable powerhouse. Shoulder length, wavy brown hair, fewer than three feet tall, weighing about 25 to 30 pounds, wearing a sundress with big flowers in primary colors all over it, she was captivating. Pink clog-like shoes were her only accessories.

Traveling with her Mom and Dad, this little one had the full attention of everyone.

As the line advanced, she placed her feet parallel to each other and jumped. She didn’t walk like the rest of us. She hopped like a bunny. Her move forward completed, she said to her Mom, “I love to jump.”

“Yes, you do,” her mother replied, making eye contact and smiling.

Apparently happy, in touch with her desires and preferences, expressive, this young lady seemed free and fully alive.

The line snaked, making the “S” shape crowd control experts use to funnel large groups through tight square footage. A woman who, like me, had been watching and admiring the girl, was now close enough to converse with her.

“Hi there,” the woman said, smiling at the little girl.

“Hi,” she said, leaning forward, lifting her face up to meet the woman, eye-to-eye, her little hand on the rope that separated the two of them.

“How old are you,” asked the woman.

“I’m three.”

Now, here comes the best part.

The woman said, “You’re so cute!”

Without hesitation, self-deprecation or prideful arrogance, the little girl responded simply. “I know!”

Delighted, I laughed. “I know!” Now that’s something else: to be cute and know it.

The mother and father looked at their child, and the woman, and smile. The energy and intentions of the exchange, on everyone’s part, was healthy, heart-warming and affirming; all pure and positive.

Have you ever taken the time to dive deep and explore the energetic impact of exchanges you experienced in your early life? Were you exposed to energy and intentions – words and nonverbals – that affirmed and validated you, or diminished and discounted you? Raised and taught by people who loved us but, often unknowingly, did more to damage our sense of personal power, freedom of self-expression and self-confidence, many of us had the latter experience. But not this young woman.

I asked, “What’s your name?”


Summer has great awareness of the truth of who she really is. She knows that she’s magnetic; captivating; deserves to be the center of positive attention; has a right to free self-expression; can move and enjoy her body; and can agree, out loud even, without shame, when others acknowledge that she is cute. Her beautiful Spirit is visible – free, open and vulnerably expressed. Therein lies her power and charm.

Summer embodies the wonder and magic of the incredible gift she is to the world. Do you? This little one brings joy and light to the world. Her energy and intentions – her thoughts, feelings and beliefs about her self – are aligned. She knows she is good, safe, is here to enjoy herself and others. She knows it and she shows it.

As we moved through the security line – laptops and electronics out and into the tray; shoes, jackets and purse into another, stepping through the scanning machine (luckily no pat-down this time),then collecting just x-rayed bags, redressing, repacking the laptop and electronics, I had a chance to chat more with Summer and her mother, Steph.

“Summer, you were a hit with all these people. You held everyone’s attention. We were all so happy to see you!”

Steph smiled and said, “Everywhere we go, people notice her. It’s always like this.”

And, what did Summer say?

“I know!”

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